Post by Frieza on Dec 5, 2008 19:52:35 GMT -5
“Lets get fucked up guys!” Frieza yells to no one in particular. It was a Friday night and Frieza decided to hit up a party after training. After calling all his friends, they decided to crash a party at their local college. Rumor had it that the school’s cheerleaders were protesting the lack of funding given to them for uniforms by showing up at the part naked and giving favors for money to help raise money. So Frieza sets off towards the party with his friends.
“Hey Frieza! Do you think I will finally get laid tonight?”
“No, Cuz. Dude don’t you have a girlfriend?”
“Yeah, we’ve been dating for over a year now.”
“And you haven’t done it yet?”
“No. She wants to wait for marriage. Its pretty ridiculous.”
“Hey, I have a question then…. She’s a Vegetarian right?”
“Yes Frieza. What does that have to do with anything though you creep?”
“So she can’t eat meat then. Am I correct?”
“I still don’t get where your going with this. What the hell are you talking about?”
“Well…. Does that mean she doesn’t blow you either? After all, she can‘t have meat.”
After arriving at the party with his friends, Frieza goes to work on the entire collection of alcohol all throughout the apartment. “Frieza. What the hell you’re the DD! How can you be drinking this much?” “Yeah. I’m the designated drinker. That’s how.” “You dipshit that’s not what DD stands for. It stand for designated driver.” Frieza ignores him and continues with his drinking of all liquid in sight. Having gotten to the point where any normal person would be passed out, Frieza decides to try his luck with getting one of the cheerleaders into bed. However, when he walked into the room he noticed that every cheerleader looked exactly the same. “Shit. This always happens when I get plastered…. I hope I don’t end up with the ONE fat chick. Considering there are thirty five or thirty six cheerleaders I would think my chances of getting her are pretty slim.” So Frieza goes to work hoping to find the hottest cheerleader around.
After walking around the apartment for an hour, falling over multiple times, walking into many walls and many doors, and tripping over too many pieces of furniture to count, Frieza finally stumbles upon who he was looking for. The hottest looking woman he ever saw. Her satisfying and mouth watering body standing in front of him. Walking over he starts talking to her. “Whooo huu sehh wifff mee?” His slurred voice making communication hard, it takes him nearly half of an hour to get the point across that he would like to fuck the hell out of her. She agrees and Frieza finally gets the woman to come upstairs with him. After getting to the bedroom, Frieza realizes he is finally going to get laid. “FRIEZA WAKE UP YOU LAZY BASTARD!”
“Huh? What happened? Where am I? Why the hell did you wake me up. I was about to bang that chick!”
“Dude. What are you talking about. You did bang that chick last night! We have it on tape!”
“Sweet I want to see!”
So Frieza’s friends pull him into the room with the giant TV. Frieza is excited to see how well of a job he did. As his friends go to burn the DVD, Frieza turns to Tien and says “Think I will like the job I did?” “Yeah. I think you will LOVE the DVD dude.” After a good ten to twenty minutes of waiting for his friends to finally finish burning the DVD, they finally return to show him the splendor which took place the previous night. As they pop in the DVD and it starts Frieza smashes his head off the ground. It was a tape of Tien having sex with his mom.
Word Count: 645
“Hey Frieza! Do you think I will finally get laid tonight?”
“No, Cuz. Dude don’t you have a girlfriend?”
“Yeah, we’ve been dating for over a year now.”
“And you haven’t done it yet?”
“No. She wants to wait for marriage. Its pretty ridiculous.”
“Hey, I have a question then…. She’s a Vegetarian right?”
“Yes Frieza. What does that have to do with anything though you creep?”
“So she can’t eat meat then. Am I correct?”
“I still don’t get where your going with this. What the hell are you talking about?”
“Well…. Does that mean she doesn’t blow you either? After all, she can‘t have meat.”
After arriving at the party with his friends, Frieza goes to work on the entire collection of alcohol all throughout the apartment. “Frieza. What the hell you’re the DD! How can you be drinking this much?” “Yeah. I’m the designated drinker. That’s how.” “You dipshit that’s not what DD stands for. It stand for designated driver.” Frieza ignores him and continues with his drinking of all liquid in sight. Having gotten to the point where any normal person would be passed out, Frieza decides to try his luck with getting one of the cheerleaders into bed. However, when he walked into the room he noticed that every cheerleader looked exactly the same. “Shit. This always happens when I get plastered…. I hope I don’t end up with the ONE fat chick. Considering there are thirty five or thirty six cheerleaders I would think my chances of getting her are pretty slim.” So Frieza goes to work hoping to find the hottest cheerleader around.
After walking around the apartment for an hour, falling over multiple times, walking into many walls and many doors, and tripping over too many pieces of furniture to count, Frieza finally stumbles upon who he was looking for. The hottest looking woman he ever saw. Her satisfying and mouth watering body standing in front of him. Walking over he starts talking to her. “Whooo huu sehh wifff mee?” His slurred voice making communication hard, it takes him nearly half of an hour to get the point across that he would like to fuck the hell out of her. She agrees and Frieza finally gets the woman to come upstairs with him. After getting to the bedroom, Frieza realizes he is finally going to get laid. “FRIEZA WAKE UP YOU LAZY BASTARD!”
“Huh? What happened? Where am I? Why the hell did you wake me up. I was about to bang that chick!”
“Dude. What are you talking about. You did bang that chick last night! We have it on tape!”
“Sweet I want to see!”
So Frieza’s friends pull him into the room with the giant TV. Frieza is excited to see how well of a job he did. As his friends go to burn the DVD, Frieza turns to Tien and says “Think I will like the job I did?” “Yeah. I think you will LOVE the DVD dude.” After a good ten to twenty minutes of waiting for his friends to finally finish burning the DVD, they finally return to show him the splendor which took place the previous night. As they pop in the DVD and it starts Frieza smashes his head off the ground. It was a tape of Tien having sex with his mom.
Word Count: 645